'Stunningly vulnerable and poetic' GILLIAN ANDERSON

'A generous-spirited, imaginative exploration of how to live life differently' REBECCA WAIT

'A candid and insightful perspective on love in all its forms' STYLIST

'A spectacular memoir written with verve and style' NANA DARKOA SEKYIAMAH

What if you dared to want more – from love, from life, from yourself?

Deepa Paul rises from her boyfriend’s bed in the early hours of dawn. She gets dressed, slips away with a kiss and cycles home where she is welcomed lovingly by her husband. There isn’t a glimmer of shame, deception or guilt, only the honesty and compassion needed to make this kind of life possible – even if it wasn’t always this easy.

Whose idea was it? What are the rules? Are you ever jealous? Deepa answers these questions openly and tenderly, as she seeks the truths that so many of us want to discover. Can I ask for what I want? Do I deserve it? Is it worth it?

Beautiful and bold, this is one woman’s story of becoming, of desire and of identity, and of asking the questions she deserved to find the answers to.

'A fascinating and big-hearted portrait of sex, intimacy and non-monogamy' CLOVER STROUD

'Reads like a long-overdue conversation with an old friend, will leave you thrilled and humming with possibility' YAEL VAN DER WOUDEN

'Raw, vulnerable, and unexpectedly relatable' EASTERN EYE

'An honest look at how to navigate multiple partners and motherhood. Expect to have your preconceptions rattled' STYLE

'A brave and elegantly executed memoir about the power of writing your own rules, shaking off shame and fighting for a marriage to work' SUNDAY TIMES IRELAND