Dear reader, if you have never heard of the Baudelaire orphans, before you read even a single sentence, you should know the following: Violet, Klaus, and Sunny are kind and smart children, however, I am sincerely sorry to say this, their lives are filled with misery and misfortune.

The adventures of these three children are dreadful and sad – indeed, the one described in this book may be the worst of all. If you do not have a strong enough stomach for a story that includes a hurricane, an invention for a signal, hungry leeches, cold cucumber soup, a scoundrel, and a doll named Beautiful Penny, then it is better not to read the book.

I, for my part, will continue to document the tragic adventures of these children. As for you, you must decide if you can endure reading them.

With deep respect,
Lemony Snicket