Unless you are a slug, sea anemone, or a fungus, you probably prefer to stay dry. You might also prefer not to read this book, where the Baudelaire orphans face enormous amounts of moisture as they plunge into the depths of despair and indeed underwater.

In fact, the terrifying things they encounter are too numerous to list, and you certainly wouldn't want me to mention the worst of all, which include various mushrooms, a desperate search for something that has been lost, a mechanical monster, a desperate message from a lost friend, and some clappers.

As a devoted author who has vowed to continue chronicling the torturous tale of the Baudelaires, I must continue to sink deeper and deeper into the cavernous depths of their lives. You, on the other hand, can dive into a more cheerful book to keep your eyes dry and your soul as well.

[Excerpt from the text on the back cover of the edition]